Alzheimer’s Notes

Can Caregiving for an Alzheimer’s Family Member Draw Familes Closer?

by Mary Emma Allen on July 24th, 2007

When illness, lack of ability to care for oneself, or Alzheimer’s strikes a family, will it draw them closer together or cause a rift?  There’s no specific answer.  Each family responds differently; each family member has their way of coping…or not coping.  How each one reacts can affect the others and the patient.

Scott Bond, in the Corvallis Gazette-Times,  wrote “Caregiving can draw families closer.”  He writes about how he experience a closer bonding with  his family when helping as his father went through chemotherapy. 

My husband’s family of eight boys all pulled together when both their parents experienced illnesses, growing older, moving to assised living, and finally facing death.  It was wonderful to watch them support one another and their parents during these times.

However, not all families react as Scott Bond’s and my husband’s.  Coping with parents’ aging, need for assistance, and/or Alzheimer’s often creates tensions and fosters disagreements.  The siblings find it difficult to determine how to care for the parent and who will care.  Sometimes the care falls primarily on one family member with others giving advice but not assisting.  This can create strife and hurt feelings.

Also, disagreements among family members make it more difficult for the patient to cope.  Resolve to get along, be understanding…at least for those days of caregiving…and perhaps you’ll discover it carries over into your relationships beyond caregiving. 

And your family may draw closer!

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POSTED IN: Care, Caregivers, General, Personal Caregiving Experiences